Dear Margaret Cho,
I've never watched your comedy routines because they seem born out of sadness and anger and that doesn't appeal to me. Because we don't live in the US, we don't get the 24 news cycle of who said what and did what and so on and I don't miss that. But today a friend sent me a link where I read that you had said something along the lines of not wanting a baby at your age because you don't want a "retard."
And so, Margaret Cho, as the foster mother of a little boy that many people would consider a "retard" because of his Down Syndrome, I wish for you some things.
Most of all, may you be blessed. May you be blessed with a little boy that wakes up every day happy and enthusiastic to greet the day. May you be blessed with a little boy who waves goodbye and blows kisses from his crib when it's time to go to sleep at night. May you blessed with a little boy who sleep with his cute little but in the air. May you be blessed with a little boy who wears footie pajamas with dinosaurs on them.
May you be blessed with a little boy who can't walk alone at 2 and half because of some low muscle tone. May you be blessed to hold his hand as he practices walking. May you be blessed as you watch him speed crawl on the ground. May you be blessed as you bounce him on a ball to increase his muscle tone so that he will walk.
May you blessed as many people in our community are as we walk around and he waves and says hi to everyone. May you be blessed by a community of people who enthusiastically ask about your little boy and clap and cheer his every step.
May you be blessed by a little boy that likes to play tiger and put up his "claws" and roar. May you be blessed as he plays with his stuffed animals tenderly and wraps them in blankets and rocks them. May you be blessed as he sings and claps to music.
May you be blessed as he plays cars and trains and throws balls. May you be blessed as he screams his head off during a bath. May you be blessed as he throws food on the ground from his high chair. May you be blessed as he pulls your hair...hard.
May you be blessed by the sweetness that pours out of this little boy and the open heart of love that he has.
Maybe you be blessed as you look at this little boy at night and know how lucky you are to have him...for us just a few years until he goes to his forever family.
May you be blessed Margaret Cho and may you learn from this experience that words are never just words and that labels hurt and destroy. May you be blessed.
17 comments:
powerful and grace-filled, Sandy. Thank you for this.
Sandy, this is a beautiul post. I love your heart. Ms. Cho's words were hurtful and unkind.
Excellent! Great writing Sandy
Margaret Cho should be so lucky to have a child as wonderful as your little foster son!
Very well-written...
Beautiful! It brings tears to my eyes each time you talk about him rocking his stuffed animals. What a beautiful child!
I'm always skeptical when a public figure issues an apology for stupid statements, but this one doesn't appear to be manufactured by an insistent publicist. It seems sincere. (FYI I am very anti-Cho for the most part. Can't stand her brand of humor):
http://www.margaretcho.com/2012/06/01/more-apologies/
I agree-it does seem sincere.
Lots of crying reading this. My youngest is having some developmental delays we are still trying to figure out (he is 18 months) - he has low muscle tone, just learned to crawl a few weeks ago, no real words yet other than mammamamma daddada, and other things. No matter how he develops or doesn't develop, I am blessed and privileged to be his mommy.
You have gracefully expressed yourself and so many of us in the "special needs" community! Thank you for responding with love and gentleness and setting an example for us all...
I am also in tears reading this. My baby is developmentally delayed and is the light of our life. Thank you for posting this.
Powerful and beautiful and oh so true..so full of truth on an issue that means so much to me, to our family, to the way we look at the world because we too are blessed.
This was very well written, Sandy. You are a great person, and I hope all the best for you and your son.
As someone who is a little rougher around the edges, I have to say that the talentless, so-called comedian, Margaret Cho is one of the worst kind of people and should be locked away because the world would better without people like her.
Amazing. My sister worked with a girl who had down's syndrome and she was the greatest. We all loved her so much.
I was so angry as a special needs parent, reading what Ms. Cho said.. and your response was much more eloquent than what I had in mind..Our Angel is the light of our life and I pray that someday Ms.Cho could ever know the UNconditional love of a special needs child.. and have that child teach her about acceptance, appreciation and understanding differences..
Compassion and grace. I am in awe of your composure and generosity. Thank you for showing us all a better way. Peace.
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